Three More Advocacy Tips

I hope everyone is enjoying the beautiful Christmas season!

Over the last few weeks we’ve been looking at some tips how to be your child’s best advocate. So far we’ve discussed: Polite, Patient, Persistent, Investigate, Inquire and Insist. Here are three more tips that may be helpful for you.

Document – Write everything down! I like to keep all of my kid’s info in a three ring notebook with dividers and paper. This way everything is in one place. When you make phone calls or email people here is a short list of items you may want to keep track of.

1. Get the names of everyone you talk to, especially those who are directly involved with your case. Jot down not only their name, but also their title and/or credentials.

2. Make sure to get all of their contact information such as: phone number, extension number (if available), email address, work hours, etc.

3. Keep careful notes of what you said/asked and their responses. It may be a good idea to repeat a summary of what you just talked about back to them to make sure everybody’s on the same page. I try to send them a follow up email whenever I can with a summary of the dialog for their review. This way they have a chance to change something if need be.

4. Keep several copies of your child’s legal and insurance information such as: your child’s birth certificate, Social Security Number, Insurance information and policy numbers. Some organizations will only accept a certified copy of the birth certificate from your state, but most places just want to see a copy. It would be a good idea to check this out ahead of time since a lot of people do not have a state certified copy of their child’s birth certificate readily available.

5. Since identity theft is so prevalent these days, it would be wise to only give out/list on applications, you child’s Social Security Number on a need-to-know basis. Stop and think about why do they really need to know your child’s SSN? Sometimes there is no way around it, but in many cases this information is requested on an application and they do not use it for any reason at all. Does the dentist, eye doctor or even doctor really need the SSN? Unless it is somehow attached to insurance information or state programs, they probably really do not need it.

6. Keep an extra copy of the insurance card so you can just give it to providers, if needed. For example: Our children regularly visit my parents who live a couple of hours away. I gave copies of our family’s insurance card and information to them. As luck would have it, my parents have had to use this information several times since some of my kids seem to enjoy ‘visiting’ the folks at Urgent Care! This has saved us a lot of hassle since the local Urgent Care in my parents hometown had all the info they needed to treat my children when they were ill.

Do – Make sure you follow up and do whatever you agreed to do! Make yourself a 1, 2, 3 checklist with a log to document names, numbers, dates the request was made, etc. Sometimes this information needs to be exchanged very quickly, so if you have all the info with you, you will not have to scramble to get the info.

For example:

1. Call the dentist (Dr. A) and have them send me the paperwork that allows them to release my child’s records to other doctors, dentist (Dr. B), etc. Most facilities call this a “Medical Release Form” or some other type of “Release of Records Request”.

2. Fill out, SIGN it and send it back to Dr. A.

3. Give Dr. A time to get the request form (a few days if time allows)

4. Call Dr. A.’s office and ask them to send the records I requested to Dr. B. (document staff names and their role in the office to make sure I have talked with the appropriate person)

5. Follow up phone call with Dr. B to make sure they have received the information they needed.

Determined – Never give up! You may sometimes feel like you are making a nuisance of yourself and maybe you are. However, you are doing this for your child! They are more important than what other people think about you! If you have not already come to this conclusion, you now have permission to not always care what other people think about you. You have to keep in mind what your goal is and keep working to make it happen. Do not give up! Seek out others’ help if you need it. If you are feeling discouraged and defeated, you may want to seek assistance from a friend or family member who is more forward and outspoken than you are. They don’t have to fight your battles or even get involved, but they may be able to help give you some coaching and encouragement. Sometimes it is a good idea to consult with someone who is not emotionally involved in the situation to help give you a more balanced perspective on things.

If you believe strongly that something needs to be done or changed on your child’s behalf, please do not let anyone make you feel like you are asking too much or causing an inconvenience. You may be causing an inconvenience…but that is just part of it and your child is well worth every bit of it!

Getting proper rest will also help with this. Being exhausted and grouchy is usually counter-productive when you have to stay focused and determined. You may have to let something go in order to get enough sleep, but you just have to keep in mind what your core priorities are and stick to that.

I hope that some of these tips will help you or someone you know. Again, please share your stories of how you have had to advocate for your child (or other family member). What have you learned that may help someone else?

Cherri